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Most ridiculous film plots of 2008

It’s been a good year for movies, if you don’t analyze the plots all that much.  I often wonder what movies would be like in real life, i.e. Tony Stark in Iron Man would just be killed once the terrorists realize a ransom won’t be paid.  But then that would make most movies like 30 minutes long.  I’m okay with that.  Coming back home, I watched The Dark Knight again and realized that even though it’s a gripping crime drama and held my attention for two-plus hours, the plot is absurd.  And that’s why those two movies make the list, along with Mama Mia!, Indiana Jones, Sex and the City, Hancock, and Wanted. I won’t include the final one on the list, since it makes for a good punchline.  [The Guardian]

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Review: Sex and the City

The chatter of excited women gathered in the theater set the tone for opening night of the Sex and the City movie. Only a few seats were still empty, and only a few were occupied by men. My sister exclaimed over pre-movie drinks that any man worth his salt would not be dragged to the movie against his will and I had to counter and suggest that any woman worth her salt wouldn’t even try. The SATC movie premier was clearly a night for women to celebrate being women.

With all of the excitement and the tangible camaraderie hanging in the air, I admit I was jazzed to see the movie. However, when I left I felt dazed, confused, and a little pathetic about being a single woman in this world. And, correct me if I am wrong, but shouldn’t the SATC movie make me feel the opposite of that? Uplifted, confident, and secure in my womanhood? Yeah, I thought so too.

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For the ladies

Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie Bradshaw

“Now it’s time to reveal all. . . those fans who don’t want to know the plot, turn away now.

The film opens up in the present day and all is looking rosy for three of the SATC girls. Carrie is living with Big and they’re due to get married. Charlotte and Harry have adopted their Chinese daughter and are playing happy families while Samantha has moved to California to be with her sexy younger man Smith.” [continue for spoilerage]

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Sex and the City – trailer

Oh, I’ll admit it.  I don’t hate Sex and the City.  Having seen enough episodes, there’s a lot that I don’t like about the show, but there’s certainly enough that I find enjoyable.  And after all these years, it’s still the only “young professional women in NYC looking for love” that doesn’t feel the least bit contrived.  That’s saying something.

So with this new trailer for the upcoming movie it looks more of the same.  Samantha slutty it up, Carrie being all wishy washy, Miranda with the deadpan humor and Charlotte is a mom.  Which is to say that the runaway marriage plot line will be difficult to pull off, without feeling contrived.

Oh yeah, plus there’s Jennifer Hudson and she was on American Idol, so she has that going for her.  Hard to believe she won an Oscar last year.

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Morning Links

Just a few things to start your day with.  Let’s get it kicked off.

- Rachel Ray and her annoying mouse voice are rumored to not like Dunkin’ Donuts coffee.  You know, the coffee she gets paid to endorse.  Alls I can say is why don’t they fire her.  I’ll gladly take her paycheck and shoot the commercials and drink the coffee.  Yeah I know it tastes really watery (much in the same way Starbucks always taste burnt and dirty) but the last sip of Dunkin’s when it’s all sugar at the bottom is a great way to start the morning.

- Rodrigo over at the always excellent The Playlist is reporting that Karen O, she of Yeah Yeah Yeahs fame, is penning the soundtrack for the delayed Spike Jonze-directed/Dave Eggers-written Where the Wild Things Are.  This is one of our most anticpated movies of 2008 and adding Karen O to the mix brings it up a notch.   Glad to see that ex-lovers can still work together.

- Daniel Day-Lewis’s iconic role as Daniel Plainview (is it too early to call this one a historically good performance yet?) in the best reviewed movie this year, There Will Be Blood, even has a catch phrase.  Not bad.  If you haven’t seen the movie he screams the line “I drank your milkshake!” and for one reason or another people have latched onto it.  It didn’t take long for someone to introduce Plainview to Kelis.

- Scottish rockers Franz Ferdinand spoke with Billboard about recording their third album and they are calling it a “dirty pop album.”  Whatever that means.  So long as they aren’t going the Britney Xtina approach.

- According to Brooklyn Vegan, the Smithsonian is opening an exhibit dedicated to hip-hop that will run from Feb. 8 until Oct. 26.

- Chantreuse Neko Case, excellent solo or doing duty with New Pornographers, is now getting immortalized in cartoon form on Aqua Teen Hunger Force and then on a new Adult Swim Show.   That new show is titled Cheyenne Cinnamon and the Fantabulous Unicorn of Sugar Town Candy Fudge, so of course Neko is the voice of Cheyenne.  God once asked Neko to be his voice for human ears.  True story.

- New Sex and the City poster is out.  Carrie is so super-duper glamorous.  Oh my god!

- It’s not just athletes using HGH and Steroids.  It’s also the rappers like 50 Cent.  Well rumored anyway.  Also mentioned were Mary J. Blige and uber-producer Timbaland.  Huh?

- A bit of sad news, but Brit pop-tart Lily Allen has suffered a miscarriage with her boyfriend, The Chemical Brothers Ed Simons.  We wish her all the best in recovering and dealing with this unfortunate news.

- J.J. Abrams is casting for his next television series and it sorta sounds like a rip off of The X-Files, but not as good.  But it is J.J. Abrams right?  So we have to give him the benefit of the doubt.  He’s earned that much.

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Sex and the teaser

I don’t heart Sarah Jessica Parker and all her other hoodrat friends from Manhattan, but I know a lot of ladies do.  To be honest, I think I’ve seen just about every episode of this show, unfortunately on TNT, which means there’s zero chance of seeing any boobies, but still.  I’ve had my arm twisted and so I’ve watched.  Though I resisted at first, the show grew on me like a gym a rash and before you know I just couldn’t wait to see Carrie Bradshaw end up with John Big.  Of course I was disappointed his name was John because in my mind it was always Dick . . . short for Richard.

So, to appease people like me who will get dragged to this movie they went ahead and decided to make a movie to capitalize on all the guys who got inadvertantly sucked into the show.

I can’t possibly fathom how this movie will be remotely good.

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Sex and the City first pic

It’s really nothing more than your standard promo photo that’s been making the rounds. This is, I guess, good news for fans of the show. Since, it seemed like a feature film would never get made, but now we have Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big chilling on the streets of New York.

Can’t say I’m the least bit excited for this movie, which stars all the old gang and even nabbed Oscar winning actress Jennifer Hudson for a role in the flick. In all seriousness I almost choked on my Lucky Charms typing that sentence, it’s almost like they give out Oscars like they dole out prizes in Cracker Jack boxes these days. Just about anyone can get one.

However, we do recognize that this is exciting for lots of people.

The best thing about this photo though is the dude who played the hand on The Addams Family working his magic on the tape measure in the lower left hand corner of the picture.

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