Laura Bush Takes it from Behind and Falls in Love with George’s Cock

Mrs. Bush Shows How to Fist-Fuck

File this under “disgusting.”

Inexplicably popular (female) author Curtis Sittenfeld’s newest tome fictionally explores the life of First Lady Laura Bush, and doesn’t skimp on the erotic particulars.

American Wife, due in September, is loosely based on Mrs. Bush’s existence, including a fatal car accident at age sixteen (she didn’t die, obviously) and marrying an idiotic man-child who later became President of the United States.

Radar Magazine has the skinny on a few of the more stomach-churning scenes of eroticism, made disgusting by replacing the main characters with George and Laura Bush.? What’s that?? You can’t wait to read about George Bush’s cock?? Well, here you go:

But I felt a great devotion to Charlie when I first got a look at his, the ruddy-hued, upward-pointing shaft, its swollen veins and cap-like tip. All of it was so completely of him, and I felt how there was no part of his body I wouldn’t want to touch, no way I wouldn’t allow him to touch me.

And this is the scene where Bush chomps on Laura’s cooter:

His cheeks between my thighs, his bobbing head, and his earnest assiduous lapping?very quickly, it was too much to bear, and I gasped and cried out. It was like tremors, and I felt my thighs clenching around his head, and when he came up a few seconds later and kissed my forehead, I said, ‘I hope I didn’t suffocate you,’ and he said, ‘I can’t think of a better way to go.’

God that’s disgusting.? Of course, this is fiction, people, so it’s not really Laura’s va-jayjay or George’s wiener.? But still: it’s no big secret.? Clearly this monkey passion stems from the douchebag we twice elected.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • T Z May 5, 2010, 1:38 pm

    Notice the "douchebag" author of this little gem doesn't have the integrity to sign his name. Anonymity of the internet sure brings all kinds of weak scumbags out of the woodwork. The author of this piece is neither a professional nor a worthwhile person. It is a shame that worthless crap like this even makes it to print, albeit only digital print. The author of this piece of crap should have the dignity to just leave their worthless, lowest-common-denominator thoughts where they belong: inside his or her empty head, where I am certain all kinds of equally worthless thoughts are formed as byproducts of his or her total lack of self-respect and self-loathing that no doubt stem from an mentally unhealthy and dysfunctional upbringing.

  • T Z May 5, 2010, 1:38 pm

    Notice the "douchebag" author of this little gem doesn't have the integrity to sign his name. Anonymity of the internet sure brings all kinds of weak scumbags out of the woodwork. The author of this piece is neither a professional nor a worthwhile person. It is a shame that worthless crap like this even makes it to print, albeit only digital print. The author of this piece of crap should have the dignity to just leave their worthless, lowest-common-denominator thoughts where they belong: inside his or her empty head, where I am certain all kinds of equally worthless thoughts are formed as byproducts of his or her total lack of self-respect and self-loathing that no doubt stem from an mentally unhealthy and dysfunctional upbringing.

    • T Z May 5, 2010, 1:42 pm

      Amendment: The douchebag's name is y BRENNON SLATTERY, and everything stated previously applies tenfold with a name like y BRENNON SLATTERY. I'm guessing, and hoping, that is a pseudonym. Sad sorry boy with no hair on his balls.
      To BRENNON SLATTERY: Get some counseling and bag groceries at your local Wal-Mart you mental pygmy.