Funny that Paper Mag’s Cinemaniac, Dennis Dermody, has compiled a list of the 10 most unappealing nude scenes in Hollywood history.? A celebration of the unwatchable if you will.? Topping the list?? Well that would be Phillip Seymour Hoffman’s pasty buttocks from last year’s Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead.?
The article is good for a laugh though.
I’m at a screening for Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead — which is directed by Sidney Lumet, so I’m all jazzed up for a gritty urban New York crime flick — and all of a sudden, the opening scene is a nude Philip Seymour Hoffman boning Marisa Tomei on a bed. This scene goes on and on and I almost flee the theater screaming. I mean, I like Philip Seymour Hoffman. I think he’s a terrific actor. I’ve seen him at the neighborhood market and he seems quite pleasant, but I don’t want to have that image of his big, bare, flabby ass branded on my brain, and now every time I see him that’s what I’m going to see. Why do filmmakers do that? I approve of nude scenes in movies. In fact, I think most stars should be humiliated by removing their clothes in front of the camera at least once. But then there are other actors who need to keep their clothes on. Even in the shower.
We’ll spare you any pictures.