Whatcha Gonna Do When the Wolves Come for You?

What’s the best way to fend off aggressive wolves?

Luckily, Slate offers an answer: “If you can’t scare a wolf away and you don’t have a viable weapon, you might try to wrestle it into submission. One Canadian man, Fred Desjarlais, dissuaded an attacking wolf by putting it into a headlock; another, Diamond Jenness, reportedly choked a snarling wolf with his hands. Some biologists recommend making a fist with your hand and shoving it down the wolf’s throat to prevent it from biting; if a wolf can’t breathe, it will probably decide that attacking you isn’t worth the effort. Climbing a tree could also compel a wolf to leave you alone, but never run away; doing so could trigger a wolf’s predatory instinct to chase you.”

You don’t even want to know how this changes if a wolf has rabies.

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