One of the biggest challenges you’re going to face in your life is how to fold a fitted sheet

It’s really not that big of a challenge for me, since Mom Oyster drilled it into my head over and over again how to fold a fitted sheet as a child.  I still have nightmares (I don’t) from the those lessons.  What’s the matter with you, it’s just a fitted sheet it’s not that difficult to fold, she would taunt me.  Kidding, of course.  She was a good, kind and patient teacher, but who wants to learn how to fold a fitted sheet as  a seven-year-old.  It’s not exactly a good skill to protect you from the bullies, you know what I mean?

Still, there are plenty of people who can’t fold one and don’t want to bother to learn so they just crumple the fitted sheet up into a ball and stuff it into the closet for the next time.  Don’t be that person.  You want to know why gentleman?  Because folding a fitted sheet like a pro will get you laid.  Just find a reason to do it in front of a girl.  It’s like oysters on steroids.

Also?  My mom could kick this ladies ass in a fitted sheet folding contest.  She was a three-time Myrtle Beach Fitted Sheet Folding Champion (1972,1973, and 1976), natch.  [via kottke]

Comments on this entry are closed.