The official site for Hellboy has three new movie posters featuring Abe Sapien, Liz Sherman and of course, Hellboy.  It’s been a slow coupla news days.  The posters are nothing special, just headshots of the characters, but we loved the first film dearly and we love Guillermo de Torro and we love Mike Mignola’s comic book, so any bit of Hellboy related news we’re going to let you know about.

Okay, first you should know that we don’t care for Jimmy Dean sausage, so when the company downgraded their sausage patty from 16 oz. to 12 oz. and decided to charge the same amount, well, we couldn’t have cared less.  However, and I have no idea how Consumerist got their hands on this message, one Southern gentleman was upset.

So irate was he that he called and left a message for the company.  You should know that his voice mail is just about the funniest thing on this Friday morning, but you should also know that it’s not safe to listen at work, unless you’ve got speakers on.  I think at the end he drops a few F-bombs and maybe some other cuss words that aren’t commonly used in the American lexicon.

Head here to hear the message.

It’s your mind as the Austin band melts your face.  It should be no surprise, or maybe it will be, but when I put my year end list together for the best albums Spoon’s Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga I think will be my number one album.  If you don’t have it pick it up.  In the meantime you can check them out as NPR is streaming a set from them as part of their World Cafe.

Also, Crawdaddy has an interesting article about everything new being old, in terms of music.  They couldn’t have picked three better bands to illustrate the point.  They interview The Holdy Steady, The Pipettes and Jack Penate.

A while back Big Rob told you all about a few commercials that rocked his socks featuring songs with haunting female vocals.  I believe one of them might have been for Ingrid Michaelson singing in the Old Navy sweater’s commercial.

Anyway, the song was “The Way I Am” and it now has an official video starring creepy clowns.  It’s sort of funny in a way that’s counterintuitive to the actual song.  It’s directed by Autumn de Wilde, who’s directed videos for bands like Death Cab For Cutie, Rilo Kiley and Elliott Smith.

Girls and Boys is out now on Original Signal Recordings.

I know of only one person who is head over heels in love with Futurama, even going so far as to proclaim it the best cartoon going when it was on television. So with the announced film of the show, Bender’s Big Score he was even more happy. We have the first four minutes of the film.

This straight to DVD release is the first of four planned released for the canceled FOX sitcom, which ran from 1999 to 2003.

Bender’s Big Score is out now on DVD; Matt Groening’s other animated sitcom The Simpsons have their own movie coming to DVD on Dec. 4. You may have seen it this summer in the theaters.

IMAGE COURTESY OF WENN

It seems the enablers have once again surrounded Lindsay Lohan…she’s been spotted having “a few” drinks over the holidays, which is not surprising, a T-Giving is traditionally a fam holiday and the Lohan clan is notorious for releasing statements that include “It’s not her fault!” or “She’s exhausted from overworking!” somewhere in their textual bullshit. Was Lohan’s sober companion fired?

From Bricks & Stones:

“She has been drinking a little bit,” a pal tells us. “Over her week in New York, she did have a few drinks.”  A separate source tells us that she had at least one big fight with her Utah beau, Riley Giles, who joined the Lohan family for the holiday.

After a late-night visit to the Beatrice Inn on Monday, says the source, Lohan was calling Manhattan pals for a place to stay. One friend received numerous voice messages around 4 a.m. But the first source says Lindsay’s alcohol intake was in moderation.

“For Lindsay, her real problem was drugs, not alcohol. In the past, it wasn’t the drinking that was the problem - it was the heavy drug use,” says the friend. “The drug use was way more intense than her party drinking. As long as she isn’t doing drugs, she’s okay.”

She’s been to rehab 27 times! Lohan should know that recovering addicts naturally replace one vice with another, which seemed at first to be retail therapy. But now she’s back on the sauce–how long til she’s back in da club? Soon it’ll be every night that she’s sippin Bacardi like it’s her berfday.

But there is some musical work on the horizon for Lohan: she’s set to record her third album, tentatively titled, “Nobody’s Angel.”Deeeeeeep. It doesn’t sound like her soul is aching to get back in the studio and reflect on all that’s happened to her since her last album (tanked), reports Page Six:

“A source at Universal Music Group tells us she’ll soon start recording her third album, rumored to be titled “Nobody’s Angel.” The tipster said, “She’s only recording because of a contractual obligation to Universal,” which released her second album. Another insider insisted, “Lindsay always planned to release a third album.”

Hmmm, conflicting sources. I would vote that she’s doing this because of contractual obligations and staying on the right side of the law, as opposed to artistic vision guiding her toward her third album. Which may include a collaboration with 50 Cent. Perfect.

IMAGE COURTESY OF IN TOUCH

Not just one, but two trash rags are reporting that Britney Spears is knocked up for the third time, and claims In Touch, she “won’t be happy unless it’s a girl.” Pregnancy is a horrifying prospect when Britney’s involved, as she can’t even handle the two boys she has and is currently half-assed fighting in court for them. Even her “Dirrty” Mickey Mouse club co-star Christina Aguilera, oh she of assless chaps and drag-queen baby showers, seems to be handling impending motherhood quite nicely (see Mollygood for her nude pregnant Marie Claire cover), but for Britney, “raising children” has been, to put it lightly, a challenge.

But don’t worry about what name will be bestowed on this *fingers crossed* girl, or even her future dental habits…while I understand In Touch and Star uncover the truth occasionally (hell, even the National Enquirer broke the Owen Wilson story), this pregnancy appears to be a ruse.

First, the falsities. From the cover of In Touch: “Yes, she’s pregnant!” the mag terrifyingly declares. “Ultrasounds, her excited e-mails to friends — now the father of Britney’s third child confirms it’s true.”

Are you guessing hate sex with KFed? Sorry, the father who confirmed this “pregnancy” is her on-off fling, music producer JR Rotem. Let me refresh your memory of his soundbites to Blender mag, now on newsstands:

“I have a fear of germs”; “I don’t invest in real estate, I invest in jewelry”; “I’m a Leo, a lion”; “I’ve seen Zoolander 100 times”; and, finally, “I fucked Britney wheelbarrow style. Just kidding. It was tractor style.”

IMAGE COURTESY OF DLISTED

Feel free to speculate what tractor-style means in the comment section. Next up is Star, who got their hot little hands on a Myspace message supposedly written by Brit, which says:

“Yes, I am pregnant and I am shocked — almost four weeks to be exact,” the tab (via the New York Daily News) claims she wrote in a message. “I don’t really know if I’m happy or sad I’m just … idk [I don't know] I am happy I guess. I saw the ultrasound and it was really kewl!”

But along comes MSN’s Hot Gossip section to cry foul on these reports, and ruin Britney’s overwhelming feelings of happiness…I guess.

“Thankfully, there appears to be no reason to panic just yet. Spears’ suctioned-on BFF Sam Lutfi tapped out a text to Ryan Seacrest Wednesday morning refuting the bun-in-the-oven rumblings.

“It’s BS,” he wrote. “Don’t know who made it up. J.R. doesn’t even know what’s up. It’s fake. Completely fake.”

For good measure, Lutfi also sent a message to People, calling the baby talk a “big lie.”

Britney “laughed at it,” he says, adding that she probably won’t address the story directly because “if she were to give a statement about every lie, she’d be giving statements forever.”

IMAGE COURTESY OF BRICKS & STONES

Other good news in Britney’s life comes from Bricks & Stones, who reports that her couches are stained with shit from her dogs and her sons’ diaper changings and the court-appointed monitor is set to declare the house a “potential health hazard”.

Also, she has a sex room with costumes that will surprise you (Psych! It’s the old Catholic school girl cliche–but would her outfit from “Hit Me Baby” even fit anymore?) and various kinky toys.

AND she tried to steal some wigs at the Hustler store in West Hollywood after taking off her own undies in the middle of the store to try on some boy-cut briefs.

She is a modern-day Howard Hughes (toward the end of his life–you know, tissues to touch everything?), or to a lesser extent, Liza Minnelli. Wacky but rich, so you put up with their eccentricities because it makes a story fit to print.

The cost for barley and hops, the two main ingredients in beer, have risen 30-40% over the past year. For craft brews that means consumers can expect to pay $5 a pint and $9 a six-pack. This is very distressing news.

“Our ingredient costs are up 40 percent from last year,” said Rob Widmer of Widmer Brothers Brewing, one of the largest craft brewers in the country after its recent merger with Redhook. “We’re talking about how much we’ll eat and how much we’ll have to pass along.”

Call it a quadruple whammy: Hops and barley acreage has been declining — hops because of a 10-year glut and barley because many farmers are planting corn for ethanol instead. Ethanol has also diverted corn from the feed market, often making it more lucrative to sell barley for feed instead of to the malting houses that supply brewers.

But wait, there’s more: Two years of failed hop crops in Europe, a 2006 warehouse fire in Yakima that destroyed 4 percent of the U.S. crop and two years of disastrous barley harvests in Europe, Australia and Ukraine. Factor in a weak dollar that has the world clamoring for our hops and barley and you have the makings of a uniquely bad patch for brewers and consumers.

It’s bad news for Oregon, where all our 60 or more brewing companies are craft brewers and where we consume craft beer at three times the national average. The beer industry has a $2.24 billion impact on the state’s economy, says the Oregon Brewers Guild.

Let’s just hope this isn’t as bad as expected.

We’ve got a few new trailers to watch including a Spanish horror movie from producer Guillermo del Torro, another rom-com starring Kate Hudson

The Orphanage

Love the look of this one. Haven’t heard much in the way of buzz about it, but if it’s half as good as Pan’s Labyrinth then we know we’re in for a treat.

Fool’s Gold

This is a run-of-the-mill rom com starring Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey. You almost feel bad for the both of them and like many of these movies you know how it’s going to end, it will hit all the familiar beats and it’s success largely depends on the chemistry of the two leads. Is anyone else excited for Donald Sutherland’s resurrected career?

Disney’s College Road Trip

Woah.  Martin Lawrence in a Disney movie?  Of course we get Disney’s Raven Symone (Rudy from The Cosby Show) since Disney has one of the best farm systems in the world.  But both leads to possess great comedy chops, so this one might not be as bad as it sounds.  Father and daughter go on a tour of colleges and bond and learn about each other in the process.  I’m guessing this college road trip ends quite differently from the one Tony and Meadow Soprano went on.

But anyone with half a pulse would tell you this would be the case.  Sci Fi Channel aired the two-hour stand alone movie special on Thanksgiving Weekend and not only that but on Saturday at 9 p.m.  Only true dorkis maximus’s like your truly and dedicated fans of the show stayed in to watch.

According to TV Week, the show “garnered a 0.8 rating among adults 18 to 49 and was seen by 1.7 million viewers.”   I doubt this will have any impact on the final fourth season and  amore accurate barometer for the show will probably be DVD sales, which comes out on Dec. 4.

The man can save anyone from anything, so it should come as no surprise that Jack Bauer is now trying to save the environment.  Actually, that would be 46 year-old producer Howard Gordon, who has been biten by the green bug.