Ever have one of those days where you wake up in a brightly lit, starkly furnished scientific facility, and are put through a rigorous battery of experiments using physics-defying wormholes to navigate chambers filled with lethal obstacles before breakfast? Do you want to?

If you answered yes, then Portal is just the experience for you. Aperture Science has created a nifty little thing called the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, or portal gun, for short. Test users are required. There will be cake at the end of the testing. You might even make a friend. And then possibly kill them.

The conceit of Portal is in the portal gun. Use it on flat surfaces to create two ends of a wormhole. What goes in one hole comes out the other, and momentum is preserved. The portal gun is your only hope to make it through the 19 test chambers of the Aperture Science Laboratory, and to finally get that elusive piece of cake.

Portal is essentially a puzzle game played in the first-person perspective. One would be forgiven for mistaking it for just another first-person shooter, as it does feature a gun of sorts, and comes as it does from Valve Software, developers of the well-known Half-Life series. Portal is even a part of The Orange Box, Valve’s value-tastic collection of 5 games for the price of one available on PC, Xbox 360, and soon on the PS3. For those with a PC, Portal is available as a stand-alone product over at Valve’s own digital distribution network, Steam.

However, Portal is definitely not an FPS. There is almost no combat element to the game; what little combat there is focuses upon knocking over and deactivating gun turrets that would otherwise kill you. No, the only gun you get in this game shoots nothing but reality-bending elliptical wormhole entrances and exits. The portal gun can be used in a myriad of ways, from taking a shortcut across a long room to redirecting projectiles of various types to new targets, to dropping a nice big Weighted Storage Cube on a cute & cuddly voiced, deadly machine gun turret.

The game is rather short, as a first-time run through the 19 test chambers will likely not take more than 3 to 5 hours (mine was right at two and a half), but the length is supplemented by 6 additional reworked-for-advanced-difficulty chambers available to those who have completed the game once, per-level challenges based on time, portals used, and steps taken, and an awesome Developer Commentary mode, in which each level of the game features commentary nodes you can activate to hear a bit about the design philosophy of the area of the game you are currently in.

The game also has a wicked sense of humor, which I won’t spoil here but I will say that the only speaking role in the game belongs to GLaDOS, a computer AI, who prods you through the tests with colorful commentary on your progress. Portal is something hard to capture in words, so I urge you check out the game for yourself. Trust me it’s nothing but cake for those that do.

Well the message has been decoded and rather than get a picture of Two-Face we were treated to another picture of Heath Ledger as The Joker in full on makeup.  He looks pretty scarey and that’s kind of perfect on this Halloween evening.  You get a voice over, presumably of Heath as The Joker saying, “and tonight you’re gonna break your one rule…”

After the picture loads it takes you to yet another website, Rorysdeathkiss.com and another challenge.

You may recall, or not, that the working title of The Dark Knight, while it was filming in Chicago was Rory’s First Kiss.

A quick follow up courtesy of Scott Bernstein over at Hidden Track. Seems both us and them were following the story about Ryan Montbleau’s difficult decision to not cancel a show last Sunday night (which coincided with Game 4 of the World Series) at the Paradise in Boston.

Bernstein was there on Saturday and he does a good job, despite being a Yankee’s fan (though most people insist the Red Sox are the new Yankees), of capturing the music and the moment for Ryan, the band, and the fans who turned out for the gig.

They almost sold out the Saturday night show and sold a respectable amount of tix for Sunday’s show. All in all it looks like every won over the weekend.

As always thanks to the boys at Hidden Track for doing my work for me via the always important follow-up.

Wanted is based on a graphic novel by scribe Mark Millar. It’s premise is pretty simple: a young man finds out his long lost father is an assassin, when said father turns up dead the young man is recruited into the same organization his father worked for and trained by a mysterious man named Sloan.

It sports a pretty good cast with Morgan Freeman, Terrence Stamp and Angelina Jolie as the heavy hitters. Rapper Common makes an appearance along with leading man James McAvoy (Chronicles of Narnia, The Last King of Scotland). The film is being directed by Russian sci-fi king Timur Bekmambetov, responsible for the Nightwatch trilogy.

Univeresal has been kind enough to release the trailer ahead of its predicted attachment to American Gangster on Friday. But watch it now over at Yahoo Movies, but be warned it’s a little too Matrix-y for our tastes.

Little tidbit for ya, but in the Mark Millar graphic novel, James McAvoy’s character is drawn to resemble Eminem (you’ll see from one of the shots after the jump taken from the graphic novel).

Wanted hits theaters on March 28th 2008. For some photos courtesy of Empire take the jump. MORE »

One of the things that always fascinates me about scary movies is that contrary to what one would think, it is not the frightening images on the screen that causes the audience’s heart and stomach to tighten, it is the film’s score. Simply put your ear muffs on any the majority of scary movies cease to be just that.If you think about the most scary and suspenseful movies, the ones forcing you to the edge of your seat, hiding behind a blanket, or gripping your arm rest so tight you get pins and needles, it’s generally the films soundtrack which pops to mind.

The association is just too powerful. That’s why one of our favorite albums at this time of year is the 101 String Orchestra’s Music From Scary Movies compilation. They’ve got their renditions of scores from Halloween, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Jaws, The Omen, Psycho, The Shining, Hellraiser and Friday the 13th.

It’s not in the least hokey, in fact, it’s actually a damn good album full of classical music, except this classical music are from your favorite nightmares.

Tracklist (with a few of our fav tracks in Mp3):

1. Halloween (Mp3)
2. Nightmare on Elm Street
3. Wolf
4. Bram Stoker’s Dracula
5. Jaws (Mp3)
6. The Omen
7. Frankenstein
8. Hellraiser
9. The Shadow (Mp3)
10. Friday the 13th
11. The Shining (Mp3)
12. Prelude (Psycho)
13. The City (Psycho)
14. The Murder (Psycho)
15. The Cellar (Psycho)

We were originally not going to include “The Shadow” track but it’s such a work of incredibleness that we had to include it for your listening pleasure. It’s not necessarily scary or suspenseful but it is heroic in a way that Danny Elfman’s Spiderman score could never live up to.

Any film scores you’d like to see 101 String Orchestra tackle for a second volume? Grab the entire album here (zip).

We’re always curious about which movies people love to watch on Halloween?  On television tonight you’ve got the requisite flicks like Poltergeist, Halloween (just about every incarnation is running on some channel) and Child’s Play.   Bravo has a special on the “100 Scariest Movie Moments”, Disney has The Haunted Mansion for the little kids and most especially Fox News has The O’Reilly Factor to scare liberals and moderates alike.

So do folks like to go super scary and gory with say, Hostel? Or do you prefer supernatural thrillers with ghosts?  What do you folks think makes for a perfect Halloween movie?

For us, we prefer going the one scary one silly-scary route.  We’re thinking of either watching Monster Squad or Teen Wolf and then following that up with something suspensful and creepy.

• EW has director William Friedkin suggest 13 scary movies to watch.
• Moviefone has a list of the 31 best horror films.  One for each day of the month.
• Snarkerati has a list of the 70 best vampire movies of all time.
• The Projection Booth has a list of zombie flicks if you prefer your undead that way.

A shame really, but singer and cultural icon Robert Goulet passed away last night.  Sort of fitting in keeping with Halloween that someone famous and weirdly creepy would pass away.  Anyway his passing away made us think of this SNL skit with Will Ferrell.

Is is wrong or odd that we hope Will Ferrell does the eulogy in character?

Tracy Morgan is one of those comedians who I swear is always funnier than I think he is. Everytime I see him in something it usually ends with me having a terrible pain in my side from laughing so hard. What started out as a side joke on 30 Rock, his character shooting a video for a song named “Werewolf Bar Mitzvah” has thanks to College Humor turned into an actual song and video.

Lots of great lines in this one to go along with the lo-fi visual clips.

What’s scarier than ghouls and ghosts on this Halloween morning? How about a video of Syd Barrett documenting one of his acid trips, that presumably made him go bat shit crazy.

For those of you who stayed up real late last night waiting for the rotting pumpkin to deteriorate with the latest viral game from The Joker, well he didn’t disappoint.

The latest campaign is something of a virtual scavenger hunt to track down 49 letters in 21 citites.  Use the clue to find the correct letter and it spells out a message.  Which is pretty much already solved… Despite a few letters still missing one can deduce that the Joker’s message is this:

THE ONLY SENSIBLE WAY TO LIVE IN THIS WORLD IS WITHOUT RULES

Kinda creepy if you ask me.  Looks like there is a photo of sorts below the cryptogram so maybe when all the letters are filled in we’ll get our first look at Aaron Eckhart as Two-Face.

IMAGE COURTESY OF DLISTED
Ashley Olsen went as a (zombie?) Marie Antoinette to Kate Hudson’s Halloween party this past weekend. This is 1/2 of Michelle Tanner’s brilliance posing with Marc Jacobs‘ boyf Jason Preston (not sure if the Mariah tattoo was part of the costume, or just a mistake tattoo from the “Dreamlover” days?)

IMAGE COURTESY OF DLISTED
Britney Spears went into Winston’s last night as a pirate wench (left) but emerged wearing what OK! Mag discovered was the bartender’s dress. A source said, “While waiting for a (bathroom) stall to open up, Britney turned to the bartender, who was wearing a low-cut black dress, and said, ‘You have nice tits! Mine are all saggy’!” What a way to open up a clothes swap.

IMAGE COURTESY OF A SOCIALITE’S LIFE
Fergie went as me circa 1994 (I got TWO crimpers that year)…jk, actually I don’t even know if this is her Halloween costume, it’s probably just her taking serious fashion risks.

IMAGE COURTESY OF A SOCIALITE’S LIFE
Rumer Willis walked the red carpet as a…fairy nymph with bad extensions? Rumer recently talked to PEOPLE mag about what it means to be a celeb, since according to her, and PEOPLE, she is one: “But at its heart, she says of celebrity, “Being famous isn’t going to parties … it’s about being able to use the power that we all have to kind of give back.”

IMAGE COURTESY OF DLISTED
Pete Wentz was his broken foot for Halloween, bc that’s all he keeps talking about on his website Friends and Enemies: “for anyone who was at the voodoo fest in new orleans- you got to see me jump around. ended up breaking the bone that connects my shin to my foot. no shows will be cancelled. i am currently trying to get a “rocker” boot so i can have a walking cast. currently my foot is the size of a small car. if you see me at a show come sign my cast.” (All-lower case writing not mine, too emo and uncaring for me).
IMAGE COURTESY OF POPSUGAR
Now, for a final roundup of those in attendance at Kate Hudson’s Halloween party: you can see Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal arrived together, Dax Sheppard showed up (he and Kate had a friendly breakup or are they back together?), and Kate looks to be having a gay old time as hostess.

And, as an addendum, I’ll post more celeb Halloween get-ups tomorrow since today isn’t, um, actually Halloween.

IMAGE COURTESY OF CELEBITCHY
In yesterday’s NY Post, Cindy Adams reported seeing expectant mom Nicole Richie light up not once but twice outside two NYC restaurants:

“MOMMY-to-be Nicole Richie. 3:30 p.m. Pony tail, black jeans, waistcoat. Exits DaSilvano with one young girl, one middle-age lady. On the sidewalk, after checking who’s at which outdoor tables, she lights up. They jump into a waiting black Caddy Escalade, Nicole into the front seat. Still smoking.

Three days later, 7:30 p.m., Nobu. For somebody who doesn’t eat, she sure frequents lots of restaurants. She’s there with the baby in the bun’s father. They leave. Outside she lights up again.”

This, after Nicole was interviewed by Diane Sawyer saying she would err on the side of caution when it came to protecting her unborn:

“Sounding neither defensive nor particularly alarmed, Richie, 25, said, “Just like any mother, you know, you want to take the best care of yourself, especially while you’re pregnant. And I’m definitely eating healthier now, and I’m really playing by the rules.”

By that, Richie said, “I do not drink caffeine at all, cut out sushi” – and, in response to questions from Sawyer, who had also mentioned Richie’s cocaine and heroin use – “No alcohol … No marijuana … No pills … Nothing … No smoking around me.”

US Weekly has a statement from a Richie’s rep via Extra: “Richie’s rep tells Extra that accounts of Richie smoking are “irresponsible and untrue.” And while columnist Cindy Adams claims Richie lit up outside New York restaurants DaSilvano and Nobu (with fiance and father-to-be Joel Madden, even), Richie and Madden are reportedly abroad and nowhere near New York.”

Perhaps Richie was mistaken by Adams for another smoking-while-pregnant celeb, Kerry Katona, a former Atomic Kitten member and British tabloid superstar.

IMAGE COURTESY OF CELEBITCHY
While the debate rages over whether mothers can indulge in a glass of wine during pregnancy (Europe seems to think so, Americans say nay), Katona took it to a level probs not approved by any obstetrician:

“Kerry, twice Celebrity Mum of the Year, downed FOUR MARTINIS and a slug of VODKA in a pub with pals—despite being 12 weeks into an already troubled fourth pregnancy.

Then she popped to a restaurant over the road for a Chinese meal—and puffed greedily on a ciggie outside in the cold. One surprised drinker said: “Everyone knows Kerry’s pregnant so it was a bit of a shock to see her drinking and smoking.

“But she just said, ‘What the hell, a couple can’t hurt’.

“She went to the bar and ordered pints for the others and Martini for herself. It was the same round when the others were buying—and she also had a shot of vodka. She knocked it back in one, winced and then wiped her hand across her mouth and put the glass down.”

Her behaviour is even more shocking after her pregnancy with Heidi was beset by a string of miscarriage scares before the litle girl was born in February.

And the 27-year-old ex-Atomic Kitten star was also rushed into hospital last month—on the day she announced she was pregnant again. At first Kerry—who is married to ex-cabbie Mark Croft, 37, and also has daughters, Molly, six, and Lilly-Sue, four, by her first husband, former Westlife star Brian McFadden—was told she’d lost the baby.

But when she returned later the same day still feeling unwell, doctors discovered its heartbeat.”

(From News of the World)